I Think I'm Ready

Today is my birthday and I really only wanted three things: the day off from work, a Mylar cat balloon, and a mimosa at brunch. The first two are checked off of the list, and I'm currently being driven to the third. Needless to say, the day is starting off perfectly.

I'm carrying this balloon with me everywhere.

I'm carrying this balloon with me everywhere.

21 is definitely a big birthday. If I'm being honest, however, I don't feel that different. Sure, I can go to a restaurant and ask for a beer and be like, "HAHAHA CARD ME I DARE YOU," and not have an internal freak out, but I don't "feel" different. I'm just going to be less panicky at dinner.

I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror and my face wasn't magically clear. Being 21 didn't solve this problem. Drat! Nor did it solve any clumsiness as I stepped out of my room this morning in platform heels and almost accidentally launched myself down a flight of stairs.

I don't feel different.

I don't feel different but I'm going to make things different. That's a physical action, not standing around pulling the skin off of my nails (a really horrid habit I should quit) and wondering why my life isn't changing because my horoscope told me Jupiter is in my true love sector (proud Gemini though!).

I'm ready to be cool with being uncool. I like going to bed at 10:30 and I hate going out. Too hell with pretending otherwise for the sake of sounding fun.

I'm ready to know what I like. Not referring to food here - I've already tried every food under the sun and I know what I'm about. No I mean people or attitudes. This past year I've noticed I let other people's opinions influence my own way too much. Sort of like if I loved Mama Mia (which I do) and my friend didn't, then while I was in her presence I let her convince me that Mama Mia wasn't that great. But with a little distance I would realize that that's CRAZY because Mama Mia is a gift to this lowly earth. I don't want her to be able to convince me - even temporarily - that Meryl Streep isn't a celestial being. That's just really disrespectful to Meryl.

I'm ready to have a business card. I have no business, but I'd like to have one so I'm going to be calling some local printers.

I'm ready for a lot of other things too, but I’m ready to have this mimosa right now so ask me about the rest later.